Red Flags
Beyond love and romance

Some Relationship Red Flags You Must Not Neglect

Do you ever wonder why do couples who seem ‘meant-for-each-other’ often end up parting ways? What is it that makes them complain about each other in a nasty way over the course of time? If you have wondered this or have gone through this, then probably you need to know about the red flags. Yes, there are couples, who miss identifying the red flags in their relationship. They realize the red flags only when it is too late or when they part their ways. It is then they think, “Oh, I should have known it beforehand”. 

One of my friends was dating a guy whom she broke up with after two years. Initially, she used to talk about how loving and caring his partner is but then she started complaining. She would complain of how clingy and manipulative he was. When they broke up, I could see my friend feeling bitter about relationships and love for a long time. She often said, “I never realized that he has a manipulative side.” 

Let me tell you, people often fail to notice the red flags in their relationship, even when things are evident. They are at times, so blinded in love that they don’t care to see the telltale signs. It is only when things don’t work out, they resent, complain and cry their eyes out. You may hear them say, “I had a gut feeling that things won’t work. Yet I didn’t trust my instincts”, “Why didn’t I see he/she was trying to control me?”

This is when the need to understand and identify the red flags arises. In case, you are unaware of what on the earth is a red flag in relationships, then read on.

What Is A Red Flag?

If we go with the literal meaning, a red flag warns us about the danger. When it comes to relationships, red flags are signs that things are going to be emotionally dangerous. It tells the relationship may not be the one the couple wanted to have. It shows there are certain things that may bring misery and heartbreak to either or both individuals. A red flag could be a lack of respect, trust, compatibility, and much more. Your partner may not be the one he/she seems to be. 

People may take time to identify the red flags in their relationship. In order to help you in checking on the red flags in your relationship, I have mentioned a few of them. Below are some signs that you must not ignore in your relationship, no matter what. 

1. The Lack Of Trust

Any relationship stands strong on the foundation of trust and honesty. If you and your partner do not trust each other completely, you can’t have a healthy relationship. There will be times when the two of you may doubt each other for no good reason. Some subtle signs of lack of trust could be- your partner insists on knowing your passwords. Or, he/she always demands to know your whereabouts or often goes through your inbox. When you ignore this red flag, your partner may take it as a ‘yes’ to his/her toxic behavior. 

2. The Controlling Behavior

Just because you are with someone, that doesn’t mean you have the authority over him/her. There are people who try to control their partner’s life as if it belongs to them. They may impose their likes, dislikes, opinions, and thoughts on their significant other. If you are dating one such person, he/she will often ask you to do things their way. For example, they may say, “Why are you cooking this dish? I don’t eat this and so, you must not prepare this.” Or, “Why are you wearing this dress? You should change it because I don’t like it at all.”

3. The Difficulty In Sharing Secrets

Sharing your thoughts, secrets, and opinions with your partner is directly linked to the intimacy in your relationship. Finding it uncomfortable to share your feelings with your partner is one of the red flags you must not ignore. Ask yourself, why don’t you feel comfortable expressing your emotions and feelings to your partner without hesitation? 

4. The Never-Ending Blame Game

Do your partner always shift his/her blame on your head? If yes, then you should never ignore this red flag. This is because ignoring the blame game in your relationship can make your partner habituated. He/she will never take responsibility for his/her mistakes. In fact, it will be you who always get to hear, even when you are not wrong. Let your partner know that it is important to be accountable for one’s actions and decisions. 

5. The Infidelity 

Infidelity is something that should never be ignored. Ignoring your partner’s infidelity is just like giving him/her permission to cheat on you and have no regret. I am not saying that you should spy on your partner. Just make sure you don’t turn a blind eye to your partner’s cheating on you. If you have got a gut feeling, confront your partner rather than waiting for him/her to admit his/her infidelity. Some people often expect their partner to confess about their cheating chapter and allow themselves to get hurt.

6. The Absence Of Mental Peace

A healthy relationship is one in which you don’t have to compromise over your mental peace. Your partner and relationship will let you have contentment in your life. However, if you feel your partner is feeding on your mental peace, then you don’t have to ignore this red flag. You may start having anger issues, increase in frustration levels and anxiety. You may not realize this initially, but a partner who brings stress to you, rather than love, isn’t the one. People often overlook if their partner is destroying their mental peace and push themselves towards miseries.

7. The Lack Of Emotional Intimacy

Hands down, emotional intimacy is way more important than physical intimacy. A couple who has no-to-little emotional intimacy may complain of an unhealthy relationship. For those who don’t know, emotional intimacy is connecting to your partner in terms of emotions, vulnerabilities, and feelings. It is about letting your partner know how you feel about a particular thing, incident or person without hesitating. Further, your partner tries to understand you and help you deal with your emotional turmoil.

8. The Way Your Partner Guilt-Trips You

One of the other red flags that you must not ignore is the way your partner guilt-trips you. Though this may sound unusual, your partner may guilt-trip you, to make you things he/she wants to. In fact, he/she may point out his/her efforts and favors you just to pass passive-aggressive remarks on you. A person guilt-trips others just to induce the feeling of guilt and inferiority in others. By doing so, they try to manipulate others into doing their dirty works or accomplishing their goals. 

9. The Absence Of Personal Space

Whether or not you are dating someone, your personal space is important for you. Anything that makes you compromise on your personal space and ‘me-time always may not be suitable for you. In case, it is your partner who intrudes on your personal space. Instead of allowing your partner to do it again and again, put a stop to it. Make your personal boundaries and let him/her know that your personal space is your right. 

If you can identify one of the above-mentioned red flags or most of them, then try to sort out the things. Sit with your partner and discuss how you can make things better. Rather than trying to defend your choices, you can work on turning your relationship towards the right path.

A relationship is not just a game or an episode that is supposed to entertain no matter what. It is something you invest your time, emotions, and energy into. So, it has to be the one that makes you feel blessed, content, and loved. Just because you love your partner to the moon and back, doesn’t mean you will overlook the red flags. Identify the red flags and make your relationship a healthier, stronger, and more special one. 

After all, a relationship where you and your partner can be who you really always stand the test of time. 

Also read: Narcissist Alert! Signs Your Partner Is One

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